Well, isn’t this inspiring?! Recently I got to chat with one my Eat to Live Family members, Kierstan who has been successful losing 120 pounds on the Nutritarian diet! Hear what she has to say about how she does it, what her strategies are, and what she does when she gets off track. And she also gave us some of her favorite recipes so we can use them ourselves! Sign up for those here http://www.nourishyourlifestyle.com/cheatsheets
Links Mentioned:
FREE 5-Day Eat to Live Challenge (starts November 1st!): http://www.nourishyourlifestyle.com/challenge
Get Kierstan’s Recipes: http://www.nourishyourlifestyle.com/cheatsheets
*Emily Boller’s book “Starved to Obesity” https://amzn.to/3DVJ1pT
*affiliate links
YouTube auto-generated transcript:
hello there oh i have a fun one for you
today i am interviewing kirsten who is
one of my old school audience members
she has done challenges she’s an
original academy member she’s a member
of the italia family and she has lost
like 120 pounds i need to live and i
wanted to share her story because i
think it’s always fun to hear how other people
do their journey and we can definitely
always learn some things from them i
mentioned some recipes we she is giving
us her favorite recipes at the end of
this and these are located in the cheat
sheets on the cheat sheets page so you
just sign up for the cheat sheets at the wateringmonth.com
cheat sheets and then you’ll have access
to a page which you will be able to
download kirsten’s favorite recipes from
there okay i also wanted to mention
kirsten and i recorded this video
actually in june of 2021 but you’re i’m
releasing this podcast in october of
real time right now what’s about to
happen is we’re gonna have another free
five day challenge starting november
first so you don’t want to make sure
that you sign up for that
thewaterymouth.comchallenge
you will get on the waitlist and then
come october 25th we are going to be
sending out those free five-day eat to
live challenges to everybody you know
recipes meal plans grocery lists
everything you need to know for five
days of awesome eat to live eating and
i’m also going to be doing a another
four day live workshop to support the
challenge and to support your efforts in
this challenge so make sure you sign up
for that it’s going to be awesome and
right after that we’re going to be
opening up the eat to live family again
for registration so keep your eye out
that’s all of the little news and
announcements for now i want you to meet
kirsten and listen to our interview and
i will see you soon bye
[Music]
hi i’m sheri alberts and this is the
watering mouth podcast and i’m going to
teach you to eat to live lose the weight
and love the process
for good episode 10.
hey guys sherry from Nourish Your Lifestyle
here i have a very special guest today
i’m doing a special podcast and youtube
video for you this week and i’m interviewing
a nutritarian from my audience and her
name is kirsten and i just want to say
first of all thank you for being here
kirsten thank you for having me i’m
excited to be here and sharing with
everybody out there yeah wonderful so
i’ve done interviews like this before i
really like to do them because i feel like
there’s some mystery to the folks who
look successful and i think it’s there
actually is no mystery and that’s why i
kind of want to just talk about what we
do and how we how we become successful
and how we
continue on this path and just keep
going so that’s kind of the reason i do
these interviews is to help folks see
that there isn’t as much mystery as you might think
that we can all do this and
that um probably there’s a ton of tips
that maybe we hadn’t thought of before
so we’re going to hear from kirsten
today about her journey on the nutritarian lifestyle so
kirsten thank you so much we
started talking recently just you and me
because you are a member of the eat to
live family and you had um posted about
your amazing success so that’s how we
kind of know each other but i want you
to give me just a little bit more
details about how did you find eat to
live and then how did you find me
sure so um i came from the typical sad
diet the all of the bad food the
standard american diet and i’ve been
overweight my whole life and i just
was at my doctor’s office one day and
she always talks about the eating a
plant-based diet and there was a flyer
on the back of the door and it was for
emily buller who’s from northeast
indiana which is where i’m located and
she was coming to talk about her book
and i i read about it and i looked up
her book online and i thought i should
go see her but i wasn’t quite ready for
that big of a level of commitment at the
time so i ended up getting her book
which is called starved to obesity and
in her book she shares her story about
how she started doing dr fuhrman’s eat to live and i
loved what she had to say and so i
decided to give it a try and right away
when i started trying i started looking
for different types of recipes out there
and i just googled
nutritarian and eat to live and i came
across Nourish Your Lifestyle and i found
you and your videos and your infectious
energy and all of the awesome stuff that
you gave and i was i was hooked at that
point i’m kind of fangirling right now a little bit right now
actually i’m fangirling right back at
you i love to have folks who’ve been
successful with my stuff it always makes
you feel so good
so when did you find eat to live
originally so emily’s book was like
three years ago or something like that yeah so i
discovered it probably in june or july of 2020
and i read it and i decided that the
first monday of august like like any
good addict of course i had to binge
over the weekend but that first monday
of august i think it was august 3rd or
that i was going to go go full-fledged
in and at that point i weighed 258
pounds i was on blood pressure
medication even on medicine my blood
pressure was over 140 over 95 at most visits um
i was eating really unhealthy like i
said in the post that i put on the
italia family i would get a pack of
cookie dough on my way to work and that
would be my breakfast and i was just
that’s just how i ate that was you know
a carton of ice cream at night and i’m
not talking about a small one um and
that was sort of just how i live
and um so i started in august and i went
all in and um ever since that i’ve really been
sticking to it this is amazing so you
have been doing this now just for the
viewers to know when i’m recording this it’s been
just under a year is that right yes and
in terms of results i mean i lost 30
yeah first month because i was i was
eating virtually no fruits or vegetables
at all so i lost a lot of weight really quickly
but by the time i went in a month later
for a follow-up with my doctor my
cholesterol had already dropped 70
percent and whoa yeah
yeah and she took me off my blood
pressure medication at that point um
wonderful my scalp psoriasis resolved
within the first couple of months my
allergies got a lot better my seasonal
allergies got a lot better
my depression seemed to improve within
you know a month or two and then i just
kept losing weight and as of right now
i haven’t quite hit my 120 pounds but
i’m at about 118 pounds that i’ve lost
since since august oh my gosh
yeah i thought you were gonna be like i
haven’t hit my hundred yet but then
you’re like my hundred and twenty like
wow congratulations kirsten and i can see
the light in your face i can see the vibrancy
and i wonder about that vibrancy right
right before you found the lifestyle and
what that was like
how did that feel for you when you were
in that place right before you found it
oh it was terrible i mean i’ve battled
depression my whole life um and i’m also
in recovery um from alcohol i’m gonna be
sober i’ll be sober nine years in just a
couple congratulations again right
so before that i really felt like i was
just kind of going through the motions
and in fact i i think if you would have
asked me i would have said i don’t think
i’m going to live past 60 because i
wasn’t really willing to change the way
that i was eating and so there wasn’t a
lot of hope i didn’t have a lot of
energy there was a ton of shame about
the way that i ate um
you know overeating what i bought at the
grocery store people
my perception judging me um and again
just no energy whatsoever you know i
would have maybe one vegetable serving a
day i mean i just wasn’t eating very
healthy at all and so for me it was the shame
and the hopelessness i think were some
of the biggest feelings that i experienced
yeah for sure and i think a lot of us
can relate with that it doesn’t matter
how much weight we have to lose we still
have that that shame and everything too
but certainly when you’re at that place where
you know cookie dough and ice cream and
things like that and i remember actually
the thing you said from your post in the
family and you did mention that as well
having the cookie dough for breakfast
the ice cream at night when we’re in
kind of a pattern like that it just
seems to keep getting a little bit worse
and a little bit worse and a little bit
worse right and you just kind of think oh
that’s fine i’ll just have this now too
it doesn’t matter right i recall some of
my worst moments were these these days
where it just was it just never ended
right it was just
okay now what and now what am i going to
eat and now what am i going to eat and
and nothing ever seemed to
stop that nothing ever seemed to stop those
those thoughts so let’s so you have had
some amazing results let’s talk a little
bit about you first um without the food
stuff and then we’ll talk so we can give
a little depth to your personality and
then we’ll talk a little bit more about
how you got to where you are right now
because i know that’s what everyone
really wants to hear but i wanna i wanna
get to know you a bit so tell me about
who you are in real life and what do you
do for a living and and
and those kinds of things so it’s a
little complicated i’m a licensed
pharmacist but i’m actually not
practicing as a pharmacist so i teach at
a college of pharmacy and so i’m
teaching full-time um i am still an
active licensed pharmacist but the type
of pharmacy that i practice is a little
bit different than what you think of
when you think of like going to the
drugstore to pick up a prescription so
what i do is what we call ambulatory
care pharmacy and so i did an additional
year of training after i graduated
and i worked in a doctor’s office and
what the doctors would do is they would
come to me and they would say i have
this patient whose blood pressure i
can’t control i don’t know what to do
with them will you meet with them find
out what’s going on and make a
recommendation based on what the
situation is so i actually really loved
it because i got to spend a lot of time
with patients getting to know their
stories which to me is so important and
um for a while i actually lost 50 pounds
back in the day and i was actually doing
some um behavioral modification therapy
with patients as well so i’d be
interesting
yeah i became a certified uh
tobacco cessation specialist and so i
helped people quit smoking
and i helped people come up with some
lifestyle modifications for their own
health which is so ironic because yeah i
was actually wanna i want to interrupt
you there because can you tell me about
that irony what that was like for you
teaching patience did you ever think to
yourself oh i wish i used this as well
or i wish i could or how how did you
feel there oh absolutely i mean i think
when i when i started doing it i had
lost 50 pounds and i was had some
success under my belt and so i was i
felt a little more confident in my
skills and i learned the skills in
pharmacy school and i went to some
additional training
and so i felt like i could help patients
that way but i did always feel a little
hypocritical you know
the fat woman giving you advice on how
to change your life
and so that was really hard for me
because how are people going to take me
seriously and so there was a lot of self
judgment there um
and you know the imposter syndrome kind
of going on as well
yeah for sure for sure so tell me a
little bit more about your personal life
so we’ve we know sort of what you do for
work um and do you have any pets do you
have a family what’s what’s your regular
life like outside of food yes outside of
food i have three dogs i am a pit bull
junkie i have three people
they’re all girls and i’m they haven’t
barked yet which is a christmas miracle
what’s going on right now because they
usually we don’t mind if they do it’s
totally we welcome
we welcome pets over here it
yeah when i was teaching from home
during copied i my dogs like to look out
the window and so there’s always lots of
puppy butt going on while i was teaching so yeah
this will happen um
i got divorced about two years ago-ish
something along those lines that also
contributed i think to my journey um i had
some familial relationships that were a
little tough at the time too so i was
feeling a little isolated and i was
really using food a lot to cope um yep i
know i’m not supposed to be talking
about food but um no no it’s fine it’s
gonna it’s gonna seep in please let it yeah
i other than that i live by myself and
um i’m just now starting to get a little
more active in terms of hobbies but i
didn’t have a lot of hobbies because i
stayed home and ate and um
so that’s kind of a new area of my
personality that i’m exploring as well
can we um can we take a moment for that
just take a moment because i talk about this
all the time and this is such a huge
part of the eat to live academy which is
a part which is included in the eat to
live family itila family being the
monthly group coaching membership that
kirsten is a part of and um and that you
know has the eat to live academy but i
talk so much about this
and i heard dr fuhrman talk about this
in the in the beginning as well of my journey
who would you be without the food stuff
right who would you be
if food wasn’t
as i was talking about before if it
wasn’t that constant what am i gonna eat
for lunch and you’re having lunch and
now what am i gonna have for dinner
right if there was no thought about food
anymore what could come out
that you don’t even know is in there
have you started to think a little bit
about what you might be interested in doing now
yeah you know i think it’s it’s really starting to
to emerge a little bit i had a lot of
healing to do even when this plan first
started just because i was
still really hurt from my divorce and so
i was still dealing with that a lot and
um school teaching during covid was
really really hard teaching college
students the courses i teach were
hands-on so there was a lot of stress
going on so i would say for me that
early part of my journey was just still
kind of trying to stay functional um now
that we’re getting back
in more postcovid normality i think i’m
starting to see that a little bit more
it’s like um i also started dating
online after some of this weight loss
and so i’m going through all of that and
so it’s like wait i could go kayaking
now wait i can’t like
we can go for a walk after dinner i’m
i’m not gonna get out of breath and so
just even like those things just thinking about
what are my interests and so i hadn’t
fully delved into that yet i started
doing yoga a little bit um i started
meditating a little bit and i started
enjoying some of those things but i i
was just talking to my therapist today
about how i’m kind of in this
she we decided i’m kind of a slingshot
person when i decided that i was ready
to do eat to live it was a hundred
percent and boom i’m gone i like hated
the way that i was eating i hated the
way that i felt about myself and then
all of a sudden i was like okay
i’m done and i didn’t really look back
it was the same way with alcohol and i
feel like i’m kind of starting to get
there right now with other aspects of my
life because i feel like a lot of
internal tension and i think i’m getting
to the point where it’s like okay i’m
ready to slingshot forward to that next
part of my life where i actually live
because i don’t have to think about food
i don’t obsess about food i don’t eat at
my feelings and so i’m really excited
about this next step
i love that slingshot idea that’s so
cool because i feel like a lot of us
have a story in our minds that
there is no slingshot it’s all just
trudging right and like oh i have to do
i have to make the salad now and i have
to now i have to eat the salad and all
that kind of stuff and you have a a
thought about yourself that like once i
do something i do it how do you think
you got that identity how do you think
you created that oh that’s a really good question um
you know i think it’s i’m a thinker i’m
a big time thinker i overthink
everything and i feel a lot of anxiety
and i mean like literally i just talked
about this today in therapy so i have
some fresh insight into this but i think
and i think and i think and i think and
i think and i think and i stress um
and and then all of a sudden
it’s like that tension building in the
slingshot and then all of a sudden it’s
like i get tired of feeling sick and
tired and then i just want to make change
so i don’t really necessarily know where
it came from except that
having been through
my alcoholism it was just like life just
got too painful and it was just like all
of a sudden i realized i wasn’t living and
it it’s just like i don’t want to not
live anymore and so i did that with
alcohol and then i did this with food
and um it’s just sort of i don’t i don’t want
to hurt anymore the way that i’m hurting
and just realizing that life can be
easier than i’m i’m allowing it to be
i love that that’s beautiful
i wanted to mention because i know you
haven’t done a ton of the academy yet but
i did want to mention back to that last
point is that we have an a really fun
exercise in the academy that’s um
and you might want to look this one up
i’m trying to think i think it’s in week seven
in the self-care section so that’s in
the third video of the self-care section
there’s a really fun worksheet that
allows you to pull out some ideas for
what you might want to do for self-care
in this way and so i define self-care in
a little bit different way than most
people do it’s not manicures and
pedicures although it can be but
self-care is anything that sort of moves
you forward like we’re talking about
self-care as anything so so one of my
favorite examples that people never
think of for self-care is budgeting or
getting really good with your money
getting out of debt finally right these
kinds of things can create so much more
space in our world very similar to how
you’re talking about with eating to live
right um creating space in your life
that doesn’t have to do with food that
actually you know you can put that down
for a while but there is a fun worksheet
in there that is um
you take each 10 years of your life or
at least the first 20 years and you take
you could break them down in 10 year
increments and you go
what was something you love to do in
that time period so for instance um from
ages 0 to 10 was something you love to
do and one of them that’s really fun is
like i used to like to make mud pies
right i remember me and my cousin used
to make mud pies at her house all the
time she had a really cool backyard with
um woods and everything
you would make mud pies and mud cakes
and things like that
and so well what if you tried ceramics
right because ceramics is very similar
to making mud pies and that you know
that might be something you like kind of
an idea so it’s a kind of it’s a really
fun activity to sort of just pull out
some stuff you haven’t thought about in
a long time and maybe you can find
something new that will create just
spark some type of an idea there for you so
that might be
i think i need to do that and it’s funny
though you mentioned the budget because
i actually did start seeing a financial
coach as well in the past year
because
it’s just sort of like i’m ready to
clean house now all this stuff yeah
that’s it
avoided and um the stuff that was too
scary and too big and too feely because
i couldn’t handle it um i’m starting to
face all of that now and it’s free
yeah having that space to finally
start to just open up and think well
maybe i could start looking at my budget
again maybe i could start doing that and and
yeah the only way that we can create
that space is by putting down the ice
cream and by putting down the cookie
dough and having more moments to
ourselves to just think and be
who we are um
gosh this is it’s so beautiful what
you’ve found and i i want to go back to
the thing you’re talking about with the slingshot too
the idea that when we
we have all of us have different
journeys right so some of us do have
this sort of end of that spectrum where
we might be dealing with alcoholism as
well or even drugs or other things that
are quite addictive and
you know we know the definition of
addictive being something that
interferes with our natural progression of life right like
um and so that’s where it could be food
it could be shopping it could be
anything but it sort of interferes
that’s why i like to think of the
definition of binge eating as well as
being just it’s something past what a
normal meal would be right like you’re
just eating more than you need at a normal meal
not necessarily a full-on binge but just
thinking about this idea of what if we
could get our mindset wrapped around
just having what we need and moving on
right like for a meal having what we
need and then moving on
you like to think about the alcohol and
drug thing as well similarly
is there a way that we can learn to
become comfortable with our own thoughts
and feelings so that we don’t need the
substances anymore right could we
learn to accept our life the way it is
so that we don’t need those other things
can you talk a little bit about that
with your alcohol journey
was it a 12-step program that you credit
what do you credit for getting over the
alcohol in the first place
yeah so i actually did i did the
intensive outpatient therapy so um
rather than going inpatient i worked
full-time still and you went three
nights a week for three hours to a group
session where you learned about alcohol
and how it affected you and how to live
without it and so that you know that
support group of realizing i wasn’t
alone um even though in the support
group i had a different story i was a
really high functioning alcoholic and
not a lot of people had that i didn’t
have any legal issues or relationship
issues nobody knew that i was drinking i
was really good at hiding it
and so nobody really had any idea
so my story wasn’t the same as everybody
there but we all have the same feelings
and i think that kind of comes with food
too is the way that we handle food we
all have the same feelings even though
our story might look a little bit
different whether that be our weight
whether that be what we eat whether that
be what we accept as normal um and so
for me i did that and then i did go into
a 12-step program for a while
and then i ended up just it wasn’t
feeling right for me i didn’t find my
sense of community there so i actually
stopped going to a 12-step program
several years ago and i’ve been able to
maintain my sobriety through
um you know touching him with my higher
power as well as continuing with therapy
and um and just
a lot of self just work and
introspection and things like that and
so that’s really what worked for me but
it was it was that point where i would
come home from work and it was the same
thing with food i would come home from
work and i would put on my pajamas and
then i would immediately just start
drinking and in fact i was eating too i
would i would go out and i would yeah
fast food i would get an appetizer i
would get a meal and i would get a dessert
and i would drink
hesitant to say this but i’m gonna go
ahead and say it all right it’s okay two
bottles of wine you know and so i would
sit down and i would drink first of all
how do you drink that much fluid second of all
yeah it’s a lot of food and then i would
eat all of this food
and um it let me numb out and i didn’t
have to feel what i was feeling and it
was my way of of avoiding yep
and so for me it was figuring out how do
i sit with my feelings
this what i’ve been taught to run from
my whole life or what i’ve been
conditioned to run from my whole life
because that’s the only way i’m going to
make it through it is if i feel these feelings
yeah so i learned how to do that without
alcohol but
i started using food um yes instead and
using food to comfort myself and to to
find you know i would wake up in the
middle of the night and i wouldn’t have
anything bad to eat in my house
but i would get up and go to the grocery
store at two o’clock in the morning and
i would get a package of oreos and i
would eat an entire package of oreos and
that was kind of normal i mean it wasn’t
every night but it was it was normal and
enough that that it was it was a part of my existence
yeah for sure and so
and we see that a lot with folks who
have had um they’ve done studies on this
as well with folks who have had for
instance bariatric surgery that once
they get get the physical inability to
binge on that food anymore
they’re still left with the feelings
they’re still you know we still have our
feelings we all have feelings we all
have you know negative thoughts or um
and then we all have circumstances that
we view as negative as well so
covid or job loss or death in the family or
so and so said this to me and it hurt me
or whatever right we all have these
things and these things are never going
away they will always continue to be i
mean it’s 50 50 as we say in the academy
so they will always continue to be a
part of our life and
it’s learning how to sort of ride that
wave so to speak of whatever comes our
way so can you so this idea that okay
you were able to give up the alcohol and
you substituted alcohol with food now
can you tell us about august 2020
what happened and how did you get here
how did you get all the way here to
almost 120 pounds lost
yeah wow i don’t know if you could tell
me that’d be great because i haven’t quite figured it out
let’s let’s try to remember yeah um so
for me i read the book by emily bowler
and i just remember in that book she
tells her story her childhood was very
similar to mine in terms of eating you
know twinkies and all of that was just
sort of normal and how i ate and we
showed love through food
and in her book she talks about how her
child got very ill and she brought
coolers with her to the hospital and was
eating out of her car to do the eat to
live and i thought my goodness
this woman did this when one of the
toughest situations in there her life
was happening and i’m thinking i can’t
do this when i’m single and i don’t have
kids and i live by myself like i just
sort of thought
step it up it’s time to step it up and so
um i read dr fuhrman’s book and i read
the six week plan and i just decided
that i was just going to do it and so i
went through and i picked the recipes
that i liked out of his six week plan
and i i just started following those and when i
was feeling my feelings i i can’t think
of exactly what i did
but i think i think for me i just
reached the tipping point pretty quickly
where my energy got so much better that yeah
i didn’t have as much of a struggle as i
thought i would i mean considering you know i was
yeah i was gonna say actually some of it
probably had to do with just the the
feeling of well-being that starts to
come over you first of all when you lose
weight that’s fun
right we can’t we can’t gloss over the
fact of like how fun that is to actually
be losing weight and seeing results and
then as you mentioned just the feelings
in our body of
feeling so much more energy feeling like
we’re cleaning out and things like that
as well probably really contributed to
it and it you know it’s it’s a little
bit different than alcohol maybe because
with alcohol um it’s not like you lose a
ton like you lose a hundred pounds from
stopping alcohol right you but when you
sort of um start using the food instead
it really does you know you’re kind of
still masking those thoughts and
feelings but at this point um
when you give up the food part
you get so much benefit out of it right
and that yeah i bet that probably had a
lot to do with it yeah just the energy
and i think just my body getting the
nutrients it was supposed to get you
know if you yeah
you know for me that was that was the
big thing is just like my body hadn’t
had nutrition in so long and i
handled like the detox pretty well i was
really really worried about that i will
say i was very worried about how i was
going to feel and for me i went all in i
didn’t titrate up i didn’t like slowly
worry about like my gi tract i didn’t
really tell myself i wasn’t going to be
successful i didn’t do that messaging um
yeah so i wasn’t really into i mean i
was worried about side effects just from
reading about it but i i wasn’t like overly
anxious about it i would say i think day
maybe two or three pretty early on
i was eating something and i just all of
a sudden got very physically ill i could
not eat one more bite and i got physically
very disgustingly ill and i tried to eat
some soup after that i tried to eat
something a little bit easier and i just i couldn’t and
that day i was really ill and i was like
i don’t think i can do this and then the
next day i was fine and i never had any
other complications from it other than
that it was just this one day where i
physically got ill
wow that’s interesting dr fredman does
talk about when you first start this
lifestyle many people will experience
flu-like symptoms in the first week or
two it sounds like you got a little of
your share of that one as well yeah but
i didn’t you know it wasn’t enough for
me to give up on it because i think
at that point i think the big thing is
that we’re all looking for hope is
ultimately what we’re looking for um
whether that be in the bottom of the
bottle or whether that be in food or
whether that be in
you know lechonato kale i mean
we’re all looking for help and at that
point i was convinced that i was going
to find it through eating this way and
so that was enough to keep me going
through any of the negative stuff that i experienced
i love that when you went from the way
that you ate to eat to live what was
your kind of initial impression of it
did you love it did you kind of not like
it so much what you know the flavors and
things like that what was it like you know
i have always loved vegetables i’ve just
never really made them a part of my life
on a regular basis so i
really enjoyed the flavors i was
surprised at the richness of the flavors
particularly just like the salad
dressings and things um
how fulfilling they they were
and how my palette changed pretty
quickly i was really nervous the first
recipe that called for collards i was like oh
no i cannot do collars i was like yeah
but i did it and and it worked out and
you know like i said i didn’t titrate up
i know some people will start with more
spinach based i i went in and i was just
like kale all right i’m doing it all
nice and it was it worked and the flavor
profiles were really good for me i found
a recipe early on for
peanut butter chocolate and ice cream
that i think saved me yeah
i could see how that would save you
yes i guess i shouldn’t say that i did
perfectly the the fervent plan but for
several you know for the first couple
weeks i probably had that several times
a week and that kind of so in that
so that that makes me curious that kind
of a thing right because for me i wasn’t
in the i mean i definitely was a food
addict but i didn’t have the kind of
extreme where when i started i was like
i felt like i was at the end of my rope
you know i didn’t feel like that i i
made the choice because my father was
sick and i wanted to do that for my
health but i didn’t really have
a huge motivating reason or factor in my
personal life at the time other than my
father you know just seeing that but
that’s kind of like a secondhand thing
or you know just first-hand witnessing
but not really like inside of me so i’m
curious about
how you went from being an addictive
food personality type to having
something like that you know peanut
butter and ice cream peanut butter
chocolate ice cream was it that you kind
of decided to then not have as much of
how did that happen where you decided
did you say i’m having too much of this
i’m gonna cut back or how did that go
um you know i think for me it was just i
started seeing the scale go down and
that got me motivated to cut out
more of the calories and i think i also
liked eating the food a little bit more
too so i started enjoying the flavor
profile of the food even more and so
for for me i think that’s really what it
was it wasn’t like a conscious effort i
will say i’m battling a little bit of
that right now of i’m eating too much of
something i’ve been i’ve been having
some addictive food behavior with skinny
pop like ridiculous uh popcorn yep yeah
yeah yeah i love the brand i am like i
I’m not not hating the brand i’m hating my
behavior with it um
yeah for sure but for me i think i just
it was like i started to see the weight
go down and i thought i can do this
faster and i really don’t need this i
mean it’s adding some nutrition it’s not
giving me the same kind of joy that i
got when i ate regular ice cream
right and so it was sort of like why am
i eating this and what is it doing for
me and it just didn’t do as much for me
as as it used to
yeah yeah that’s good and i think i
think the answer to that to that
question is you’re
sort of like looking inwards really and
it’s kind of what we talk about in the
itil of family that’s what we talk about
in the academy this idea of it is just
the mindfulness of it it’s starting to
what we say or the sort of steps through
this are to become aware first of all so
we’re coming up where what we’re doing
and why we’re doing it maybe and then we
start to have like an internal dialogue
about it why am i doing this is this
useful for me what could i be doing
that’s better kind of a thing
and i like i love this idea that the
beginning of the journey is fueled by
the weight loss and the good feelings
and all that right and i look at my
journey it’s been over eight years now
that it’s been a lot of ups and downs
and for me i look at my journey as having um
on purpose ups and downs because of the
pregnancies so i knew there was going to
be at least a couple pregnancies that
would cause an upset
for me and i would have to relearn
everything you know and that’s sort of
the place that i’m in right now
over a year after having the second pregnancy
but it can it can be a very similar
thing like let’s say you’ve been doing
this for a year or two for anyone who’s
listening and suddenly something comes
up in your life right i remember when i first started
after a few months my father passed away
and so there was a real up and down
there on this high of you know nothing
could go wrong everything’s great of
course my dad’s sick but he’s still here
right i’m losing weight and all that and
then bam life hits again right and i
hear this from so many nutritarians and
so many just folks who want to eat
healthy that it’s that and then life hit
and then you know and then i fell off
track and i went back to my old ways and
all that and so that’s what i am most
interested in and i i want to mention
this because i love your journey and i
love the way that i feel like so much of
what you’re doing is based on
the work that you’ve already done with
the alcohol and like you already laid
this huge foundation of understanding
your feelings and your thoughts and the
work that you’re doing in therapy you’ve
already laid this really solid
foundation and so that’s what really helps you
but i and that’s why i’m saying this
because i don’t want to gloss over that
that’s the reason you’re successful is
because of your mindset and because of
what you do with your thoughts and your feelings
so what do you think about that yeah
absolutely i think that
i don’t i don’t want to say you can’t be
successful if you don’t look at your
thoughts but for me i couldn’t be
successful if i didn’t look at my
thoughts and the times when i let my
focus stray from that are the times that
i start to get into a little bit of
trouble even even now um uh
there was a while a couple weeks in a
row where i went out and got a pizza a
few times and
realizing you know one why did i do it
two forgiving yourself for it and three
figuring out what is my plan going
forward and i think one of the most
important things that i’ve learned through
you guys and particularly coach nancy
who um has just communicated this in a
way that really resonated with me was that
you can choose to make maybe
less than ideal choices if it’s if it’s
a choice versus more of that compulsion
and yeah
that she’s like what if i i think i
posted one time specifically about how i
just ate a pizza and how terrible i felt
about myself and she just said what if
instead of i know it was cookies and she
said what if you are just the kind of
person who chose to eat a cookie you
didn’t fail you didn’t do anything wrong
you just chose to have a cookie and i
was like wait
i can do that yes
i can choose to have a cookie and i can
be here is your permission
yeah here’s your permission yeah and it
was just like i don’t that was like a
big game changer for me so instead of
like shaking myself into i can never eat
the way my friends eat or i can never do
this or do that
that has been a really important thing
too you know like i’m dating right now
and so going out to eat is it happens
more often and it’s just i look at the
menu before i go and i determine what
i’m going to have and sometimes i do
have a flat bread pizza but i make that
choice in advance
yeah i’m okay with it
i know what i’m doing i pick something
that’s maybe not as you know a hamburger
and fries um but something that still is
not necessarily 100 in line with where
i’m hoping to be
but yeah i’m okay with it
but you’re choosing it yeah and that’s
that that’s such an important point
kirsten thanks for bringing it up
because that
first of all coach nancy is amazing
she’s so incredible she’s the she’s she
helps me in the eatily family she is the
private coach within the eat to live
family and um she’s just offering
helpful suggestions all the time she’s incredible
and it’s this and i sort of use this
hand gesture so if you’re just listening
to this on podcast you have to kind of
listen to my description here i use this
hand gesture all the time of you make a fist
and this is the action that you took
either over eating or whatever
and then you can just have that fist you
can just have that action that you took
or you can cover it with your other hand
which is what i’m doing right now and
you add shame and guilt and humiliation
and embarrassment and now look you’ve
got much bigger fist there you got a
much bigger issue
but if you take off that other fist the
second fist of humiliation and shame and
all the extra feelings and you say no no
i just chose that
and we take responsibility for the
things that we did instead of creating a
whole story around it about how it means
we’re terrible people we’ll never get
this and we are we’re just you know the worst and and
we’re a failure and we’re not worthy and
we don’t deserve the success and we
start creating this huge story about it
it’s not just a flatbread pizza anymore now it’s
we’re not even worthy of weight loss
right we’re not even we create a whole
thing about it
so we talk a lot about this in the
academy and in the family about
worthiness and what worthiness actually
is and how it’s actually has nothing to
do with what we do or don’t do
uh that we’re inherently worthy and that
worthy is just there from the get-go and
it doesn’t matter what we do or don’t do ever
that we will always remain worthy
and that um the actions that we take are
completely neutral
when we can just
accept the action for what it was and we
can take responsibility for what we chose
and not in a and not in a way that’s
good or bad because the action itself is
completely neutral what we did or didn’t
do is completely neutral it’s not good
or bad it is just a thing that happened
in the you know history books it’s just
a thing that happened it’s what we make of it
that creates our experience of it so
we had that flat bread pizza we can say
no i’m going to choose a flat bread
pizza and i’m totally fine with that
that’s what i want to do and
that’s it the end of it we eat the pizza
we move on or
we can be upset with ourselves or we’re
even considering the pizza as we’re
having it we can hate ourselves for
eating it then we can be super regretful
afterwards and turn it into this big
dramatic you know um issue
or we can just have it move on and that
experience is what continues to
shape the next meal and the next meal
after that and the next meal after that yeah
and i will just say to anybody out there
who’s listening i can tell you i have
done both of those and i think i did
those within a week
with relatively soon after starting
eating this way mo maybe a few months in
but i did it one way
and then i did it the other way and i
can just i can just give it just think
about it and try it because it’s amazing
when you just say you know what tonight
i want that favorite pizza and i’m gonna
have it i’m gonna eat a half of it and
you know what i’m not gonna beat myself
up and i did it and it was it was the
weirdest thing because i was like wait
i feel okay and i’m i’m not hating
myself oh my gosh food can not be this
evil thing that is gonna sentence me to
death like it’s just a thing and it was
the most foreign thing i’ve ever felt in
my entire life
and then and then i did it the other way
and i love that hand over the fist
because for me shame is what drives me
to eat for me personally yes yes that’s
right i ate bad so now i feel shame well
the only way i know how to shut that
shame up is by putting something at it
whether that be food or alcohol for me and so
and so if you take out that shame step
it it makes the program easier it makes
eating this way easier because
you’re not giving yourself that
predefined reason to continue to and i
hate to say misbehave because that’s not
true make decisions that are not
decisions that you really want to make
in good conscience but even that that is
a rewiring of my brain what i just did
there that is a rewiring that i’ve been
working on and it’s not easy it’s an
ongoing process for sure
yeah and the only way to do it as we
mentioned earlier the only way to do it
is to become aware first of all what’s
happening to become aware of the
thoughts that are occurring and aware of
the feelings that are occurring we have
some very specific tools in the family
that we use to open that up and just
start to start to see that because i
think what happens so much with us is
that when we have taught ourselves to
overeat for years and years and years
and we have taught ourselves to overeat
but maybe even binge as well we’ve
taught ourselves to add alcohol or to
add shopping overspending or any other
thing that we what we call buffer with
we’ve when we’ve taught ourselves to do
this for so many years it becomes such a
pattern and then it becomes subconscious
and it becomes completely impossible to
detect until we are halfway through that
bag of doritos or we are all the way
through the oreo package or the pizza is
on its way and we’re like dang it i did it again right
but it is the awareness before during
and after that creates all of the change
so we have lots of tools that we use about
um and we have one in specific that we
use with the scale actually um using a
scale to start to help us to work
through those thoughts and feelings as
well we use this in the tilla family in
the academy
so i’m just so glad to hear
your take on how you did this because
you you made a little comment a moment
ago that you think most
that most people like maybe there are
some people who could do it without
using thoughts and mindset and things like that but
i would be interested to meet those
people because i think the folks who can
i think the folks who can do this
naturally either have a really fast
metabolism and they don’t really have
any issues with food and food they just
don’t care about food they’re just
naturally are that kind of person that
food doesn’t matter to them but i think for folks like us
if we want to get to the place where
we feel calm and peaceful and empowered
about food again that takes some thought
work it takes some some introspection
and there is a difference between losing
weight and hating yourself
and hating yourself to lose weight and there’s a dif and
and so there’s there’s that possibility
or there’s what we’re doing which is
loving ourselves the whole time enough
to actually rework our brain and rewire things and
try to get to that place of because there’s
um you can hate yourself and use shame
and guilt and humiliation and all these
negative feelings to lose the weight and
we’ve all probably done this to some
extent i know i’ve done that so many times
and then once you get there you still
feel really shameful and worried and
like you’re this terrible person so
that’s when you gain it back because you
those feelings haven’t gone away and as you said
when we feel shamed or we feel shameful
or humiliated or angry with ourselves
that’s when we eat
right and so that is just a never-ending cycle yeah
yeah wow that’s beautiful i think you
know having to prepare for that too like i
um my family is coming to visit for the
first time they were here just before i
started this eating plan a year ago i
live away from my family and my family
doesn’t follow this lifestyle at all
and um they’re coming to visit for the first time and
yeah you’re gonna be here in about a
month and i’m already thinking about
what are the thoughts i have around with
this you know just your own family
dynamics sometimes can change the way
you behave and whatever and so i’m
already having to kind of think about my
thoughts and how am i gonna navigate
them when they’re here and i think
that’s something that’s changed is that
i’m more anticipatory of that rather
than just being reactive and waiting
sorry for my other dog here um
that’s okay waiting for it
to happen you know i’m i’m anticipating that
this might be a little bit of an out of
my routine for me so how am i gonna best prepare for that
yep yep and that is that before during
and after thinking that is so so
important to all those situations so
let’s talk a little bit about practical stuff
so when you when you go out to eat what
are your strategies do you go out to eat
of course you said you’re dating now so
what are your strategies for when you go
out to eat now you said you look at the
menu beforehand yes i absolutely look at
the menu beforehand um i
fort wayne is i’m in fort wayne indiana
and we have a pretty big vegan community
here and so a lot of restaurants have
pretty good menus that you can choose
from but i had somebody i’m not going to
be judgmental but i’m a little
judgmental who chose applebee’s for our
first date oh gosh
that tells you something maybe no i
should have not gone at that point it
went downhill quickly after that but um
there’s not a lot to choose from at an
applebee’s restaurant and yeah i know i
actually didn’t even look at advance
because i knew that i wasn’t good anyway
so i got there early but you know i just
i chose i chose um a salad and i look at
what’s on there what can i get on the
side what can i pull off of it and so i
try to think through that a little bit
um some days i make that decision where
you know i’m gonna have chicken today i
i just i i am gonna choose to have
chicken on my salad yes and i do that
but a lot of times i’ll
i don’t i stopped worrying so much about
being that obnoxious person that people
are judging for asking to have things
taken off or to have actually added i
mean i’m not totally obnoxious about it
but i’ll say i don’t want the candied
pecans or i’ll say i want my dressing on
the side i don’t want feta cheese like
who doesn’t want feta cheese but i’ll say that
which pains me great you mean like
nutritionally i don’t want feta cheese right now okay
emotionally give me emotionally
but in reality i’m gonna have you skip
it um and and i’m usually really
self-conscious about inconveniencing people
and about people judging me and it i’ve
had to set that aside when i eat out
because i oh hello kitty cat
keep going sorry
that’s okay so you know that’s i’ve had
to be okay with asking to be a little
bit high what i consider to be a little
bit high maintenance at a restaurant and
i just have to let that go um that’s a
big part of it looking at the menu in
advance and if i can choose a restaurant
trying to have some say over where we go um you know
yeah something sparked for me there when
you said that this idea of the the high
maintenance thing
um something sparked for me there
because i never really thought about it
this way before but like
restaurants are created by standard
american dieters typically right so
restaurant is created by someone who is not
understanding eat to live at all or not
even caring to their
they create restaurants that people will
buy more food so clearly there’s going
to be oil and salt and things like that right
but it makes us be high maintenance
because we have to work around all of
those obstacles right
but actually what they’re doing they’re
making it like they are making us be
high maintenance right like because
all we want to do is just eat something
that’s going to like support our life
and all they want to do is sell more oil and sugar
and salt right and so um
the advent of the restaurant in this way
like these types of restaurants that we
have these industrialized you know huge
kind of restaurants that we have have
completely shifted what normal eating is
and we know this to some extent but this idea that
we’re the ones that have to become high
maintenance but they actually made us
high maintenance i just want to like
make that point right like it’s not that
you’re a high maintenance person and i
think like when we go to restaurants
with folks like this we like oh i don’t
want to appear high maintenance but like
it’s not our fault right just like make
it so we can have a salad that doesn’t
have a bunch of crap on it you know but
okay i’ve got to leave that one right there
i think that that’s what that gets to a
really important point too is that you
have to retrain yourself to not say i’m
high maintenance so one of the things
i’m working on right now is i call
myself procrasti kirsten because i am a
queen of procrastinating and someone
just told me recently they’re like every
time you say procrasti kirsten you are
perpetuating that idea of yourself and so
i need to learn to not say i’m being
high maintenance but
you know we have to retrain ourselves i
i am ordering food that is good for my body and
that is yes it’s taken me a very long
time to get to the point where i can do
that and so even as i i said that i
realized i need to not refer to that that way
and and that’s interesting because
that’s why i wanted to sort of talk a
little bit about the slingshot thing in
the beginning because you have created an identity
for yourself of being someone who
slingshots now that’s a positive
identity so we’ll keep that one right
but when you create identities were
creating this large story around i’m a
procrastinator or i am a high
maintenance person or whatever and when
we have a story our brain is just
looking for more confirmation of that
story that’s what it does so we’re
looking for more combination
confirmation that we’re a procrastinator
or that we this or that or whatever and
um if it’s a negative story we’re just
looking for more confirmation that the
negativity exists right but even
talking about it even characterizing it
with a word like procrastination right
and so with your high maintenance thing
is you flip that to you flip that thought to
i’m not high maintenance i’m just
someone who cares about my health right
i’m just someone who cares about that
kind of a thing or i’m not a
procrastinator i’m just somebody who
doesn’t like the pain of doing work but
like everybody doesn’t like the pain of
doing work so there’s actually nothing
negative there right so it really is
just on how we think of it yeah
and i think that the same thing can be
said for you know i i’m a failure at this
yes you’re not a failure at this you’re
trying to undo years of
of training your your body to eat the
way you’ve been eating and so that’s one
of the things that i would encourage
people who are early on in their journey to try to
you know i’m i’m feeling because i’m
having a craving or whatever you’re not
you’re doing what your body has done for
the past 15 20 30 40 years that’s right
you are working your butt off to go
against it like you’re not failing
you’re succeeding but it’s sometimes
you have to face those old patterns
yeah i love the word practice in this
case it’s not failing it’s practice
right and doctors
don’t call themselves it’s not a medical
failing it’s a medical practice right so
they don’t get it right all the time either
so tell me just a little bit about your
experience with my program so you said
you’ve done um you’ve done the
challenges is that right what have you
done and then you’re also part of the
family so tell me a little bit about
your experience with my stuff so i have
been through all of the each live
academy um wow nice not the best student
during all of that’s okay it’s okay so i
i have done it all and it’s it’s all
amazing and i’m actually getting ready
to start listening to it again now that
i’m a part of the family but yeah i have
i have done a lot of the challenges when
you put them on sale that one year i
bought like 20 of them because i think
about seven or eight of them because
that’s actually it’s been
it’s the core of my success honestly um
i’m still pretty much following recipes
even a year later uh i’m making my own
challenges now but i’m still not using a
lot of my i don’t trust myself to make
my own recipes so i’m just not i’m just
using what’s there and it’s working for
me if i leave myself to my own devices
i i wouldn’t do it but that’s not the
question you asked you asked me
what of your program have i used so yes
i’ve done the challenges i have watched
a lot of the the what i eat in a day
videos i have watched there’s the live
coaching sessions that are available if
you’re a member of the family i’m
watching those i have done the eat to
live academy once through where i more
listened to it and now i’m getting ready
to launch in and do it a little more
where i’m actually doing the work doing
more of the different activities you
talk about the thought downloads the
models there’s always amazing things
that everyone out there should sign up
to have because they can just um and so
just the the community connection
through the family as well just seeing
what other people are doing has been
really really helpful for me for me
though i think the most beneficial thing
has been the challenges or the recipes
that you offer that really has
it’s it’s changed my life i mean jerry
you’ve been a big part of that the
reason i’m successful is because of
those recipes and i get emotional i
couldn’t have done it without those and
without you and that’s pretty awesome
oh you’re gonna make me emotional stuff i know
you know it’s so amazing because at this
point there’s
you know have a good deal of people in
the audience i have a really good deal
of people in the family who are you know
working these programs and these tools
every month and just creating so much
change and to meet somebody like you who
there’s a lot of people in my audience i
think who are just kind of in the
background and they’re maybe doing the
programs without telling me that they’re
doing the programs and you know in the
beginning like i knew everyone’s name i
knew everyone who was doing everything
and they would tell me everything
and now it’s gotten to this really fun
place where i’m creating you know these
programs and these programs are creating
the change right and so
i love to see this that it’s kind of
continuing to work and your idea of
going back to the academy we’ve had
people do the academy three four five times in a row
and even i go back and listen to my own
videos and i’m like hey that was really
smart i can’t i don’t remember saying that
and i learned stuff from myself again um
but yeah so i’m glad to hear that you
love the challenges and i just want to
give a shout out again to coach nancy
because she’s the recipe developer right
now of course so you know i did the
first couple challenges and i just i
couldn’t keep up with the workload and
she has just jumped in and created such
amazing recipes now for these challenges
they are they’re phenomenal so
if you guys can ever look for one of the um
flash sales that we do or we try to put
these on sale like kirsten was talking
about pick some of those up and use
those because and that is specifically
why i created challenges because i wanted to have
people understand how i lost the weight
too and it’s just these little periods
of precision you know getting through
and just doing what you got to do and
and um and learning a lot about the
lifestyle so you said something about
liking the recipes what are your
two favorite recipes that you use
nowadays in on your eat to live journey
um well i’m a big smoothie person and so
any combination of smoothies so i don’t
have a specific smoothie i just kind of
throw in whatever greens i have whatever
vegetables i or fruit i have and
sometimes i’ll just like so you were so
you were lying when you said you don’t
create your own recipes
so that’s a story but i just want to
point out you are able to create your
very own
smoothies at this point okay sorry to
interrupt go ahead keep going
thank you for reminding me of that yes
smoothies i can be a little more
flexible with i’m not yet there with
salads that’s that’s tougher for me to
get a good flavor profile i guess i
don’t have the confidence in my ability
although i was just thinking the other
day i’m like i’m gonna start i’m gonna
start trying my own i’m i think i’m
getting to the point where i’m ready to
start trying my own um but my favorite
is the big quinoa salad oh my gosh it’s
so good it’s got quinoa i don’t know if
you want me to go into the rest of the
ingredients yes tell us and we’re also
i’m also going to put these recipes down
below so if you can give us one of your
favorite smoothie recipes and then we’re
going to put this other quinoa one down
below this video so um so if you’re
watching the podcast it’ll be in the
show notes or if you are watching the
youtube videos underneath the youtube
video so go ahead so i think that right
now i just had it today so i’m gonna say
this one the anti-inflammatory smoothie
um i was not a big ginger fan but now i
can actually put in the full amount of ginger my flavor
this is actually interesting because
both of these are flavors that i didn’t
originally like um but the
anti-inflammatory smoothie is huge and
it’s really really good and i like that
it’s got pineapple in it and some ginger and greens and um
a banana and it’s it’s awesome
the big quinoa salad has quinoa beets
which i always thought tasted like dirt
and now i absolutely love crazy some
madness going on here
it’s also got blueberries and raspberries
and green onions and a bunch of greens
of course and a cashew based dressing and it is
honestly the best salad i think i’ve
ever eaten in my life i love it i could
i could eat it every day and my parents
are coming and they they like i said
they don’t eat this and that’s the salad
i’m gonna make them because i don’t know
how you could not like that salad it’s
so delicious nice
good deal i’m so glad to hear that we
have come up some with some awesome
winners for you and there are so many
other recipes out there we even do
free five-day challenges from time to
time as well and there’s a free nine-day
challenge on my website so feel free to
pick that one up if you guys want to as
well that’s right on the home page so if
you’re interested in what these
challenges are like and you’re you’re
interested in um
knowing as kirsten said it can be a
little bit intimidating to get started
but if you just know some tried and to
true recipes that can really get you
going so thank you for sharing those with us
um i think that that is almost
everything i just want to ask you one last question
what is your advice for people wanting
to get started with this lifestyle start
i i mean
honestly start i think i think
for me my advice would be
pick something that is doable for you
and start there um i was the kind of
person where i had to go from zero to
sixty that worked best for me but i
don’t know that that’s gonna work for
everybody so i think if you if you read
the eat to live book and read about how
starved nutritionally our bodies are
picking one meal that is
easy for you to to change is a really
good place to start so for me smoothies
make the most sense um yeah just because
they’re a little bit lower maintenance
than having to prep a lot of salad and
so if you’re hesitant about that to me
smoothies are a little bit easier you
just throw all the stuff in a blender
it’s a powerhouse of of of nutrients and
it fills you up and so for me it would be just pick
one change to start with and you call
this the small shifts in the program i think
i’m saying that correctly that’s right
that one shift that you want to make and um
starting there that’s that’s the big
thing but i think also just realizing that
believe you’re worth it
believe you’re worth it believe you’re
worth taking time and energy and
spending a little extra money perhaps on
produce and believe that you are worth
the time and effort it takes
to feel better and i’m gonna get
emotional because i didn’t think that i
was worth it and um you know
you are you are worthy of feeling better
than you’re feeling today and just find nutrient
you know putting more nutrients in your
body you will feel better and you
deserve that everyone out there deserves
that and i wish just 10 of what i had
for everyone out there because it’s powerful
[Music]
oh that makes me so happy to see that
thank you for sharing your emotion with
us that is that is such a blessing to see that um
from the perspective of someone who is
really good at this who’s been doing
this for a while and
showing your results with others that it’s possible
to go from where you went to where you
are now in such a short period of time
it’s just a very hopeful message so
thank you for sharing with us kirsten
thank you for having me of course so
yes thank you so much for doing this
interview i really really appreciate it
and thank you so much kirsten we will be
hearing from you more in the future hope
you love that interview don’t forget
five day challenge it’s free it’s
awesome it’s all recipes so might as
well just download it anyways to get the
free recipes right starting on november
together for five days of healthy
nutritarian eating together free
workshop tons of camaraderie there’s a
free facebook group that you can all
hang out in and help each other out it’s
just going to be awesome so make sure
you sign up at thewatermouth.com
challenge and remember if you do want to
get kirsten’s recipes you just sign up
for the cheat sheets it’s that easy
wateringmonth.com cheat sheets and you
can also on that page you’ll be able to
get all of our previous pdfs for recipes
and things too from our youtube channel
so hope you love it hope to see you in
the challenge see you soon bye
